The King of Pop

There's a fairly vocal minority of people who are almost rejoicing in Michael Jackson's death. Even as I heard of his passing from my friend, my first reaction was disbelief and that led, immediately, to mockery. I'm not sure why, but I think it has to do with how immortal he has always seemed to me. I can't claim to be in awe of him like so many millions of fans were, but he never quite seemed of this world.

Of course, he came from the not-so-exotic Chicago neighbor Gary, Indiana and was borne to normal folk who looked at their brood of talented musicians and saw something special, something revolutionary. He went from being a star in a boyband to being an adult icon seamlessly.

Yet there are those of us who demonize him and cast his career asunder because of his alleged indiscretions. I'm not here to speculate the chances that he was guilty of some kind of sexual misconduct, or at the very least, something inappropriate. I'm reasonably sure that there were some shady doings going down in the Neverland Ranch and I can't help feeling awfully disappointed in Mr. Jackson.

But are we still unable to look at a person and judge him not on one (or two or three or etc) bad thing he did, but as a complex, multifaceted human being?

I could have sworn that we were past the Hawthorne days of pinning red letters into the bosom of wrongdoers. Didn't the Jules Dassin of the 50s sacrifice enough in the name of tolerance...or at the very least, open-mindedness?

The fact remains that Michael Jackson may have done some bad stuff, but can we really vilify him after we consider all of the good he has done? He tried to heal the world and make it a better place. For you and for me...and the entire human race. He was the voice of a generation and made people smile. Everywhere.

So before you cast a stone, remember that schadenfreude isn't enough to rejoice a man's death and ask yourself how well you personify perfection in the way you expected it from Michael Jackson. Think on all of the people you may have disappointed or wronged or hurt. Think about the promises you never fulfilled. Think of all of the bad stuff you have done.

Then...after you take stock of your life in that context, ask yourself one question:

If your legacy was being determined for perpetuity, your strengths and weaknesses not withstanding, wouldn't you want to be judged based on both? So let's give The King of Pop a break and allow his legacy neither entirely good nor entirely bad, but complex, fuzzy and messy like everybody else.

5 More!!

So The Academy has added five more nominees to the Best Picture Award.

This is great news. There many years when I have agreed with the winner, let alone the five nominees, so hopefully this will open things up a little bit. Maybe we'll see some foreign, animated and documentary films being nominated. Either way, it's a surefire way to ensure that the Academy Awards mean something again.

So since I'm a giant film dork, I'm going to write a megapost about what the Oscars should have been, starting Monday.

Get excited.

In the mean time...

Changes of Venue

Richmond sounds like a good place to be right now.

Ne-Yo Soul

I obtained the latest Ne-Yo album about seven months ago, but never listened to anything from it until I recently put one of his songs on a mix I made for the drive up to Pennsylvania this past weekend.

The song is called "Part of the List"; it's kind of a run-of-the-mill love song, but I don't think Ne-Yo (who co-wrote the song) takes himself so seriously that he has to write about how much he "loves his shorty" or how "fine his bitches be". What is so interesting about this song is that Ne-Yo comes off so vulnerable singing it and how this song is so dissimilar to the current urban music zeitgeist of clockin' bitches and pullin' hoes. It's not that there's anything particularly wrong with that machismo and jocularity, but it seems disingenuous for a famous pop star singing or rapping about how pimp he is because he sleeps with so many women. Of course you do: being able to sleep with whomever one likes is one of the fringe benefits of having such vast exposure.

The song evokes emotions that haven't been willfully evoked by many pop stars in decades. I'm not saying that Ne-Yo is a modern day Al Green, nor am I claiming that he's an important artist...

But this song...this song is great. If this one song is indicative of the quality of the whole album, (which I recently purchase...just to make things legit) then the nomination it received for the Album of the Year at the Grammys is well-deserved.

The video is pretty interesting, too. I wonder if the videos from his current album are telling a linear narrative, because the end of this video seems to be abrupt and really needs to lead somewhere.

Check it out and get to know Ne-Yo and this song before it becomes one of the biggest hits of the summer.

Make 'Em Laugh: 6/17/09

I haven't seen something so sublimely hilarious in a long time.

Yes, it's simple; no, it's not high concept.

But it is really, really funny.

Enjoy.

Sarah Wailin' Palin and Her Wah-Wah Band

One awkward moment for Sarah Palin at the Yankee game, during the seventh inning, her daughter was knocked up by Alex Rodriguez.

I dunno...I lol'ed.

Alex Rodriguez is a noted Lothario.

Sarah Palin has a daughter who was impregnated.

Seems like a fine joke to me.

The Iran Situation

I don't have a strong affiliation to Iran: my aunt's first husband was Iranian, so I guess I could kind of claim the Iranian struggle for freedom as my own, but not really. Who am I kidding? I'm a white guy from suburban DC who hasn't known in his whole life the troubles that your typical Iranian person experiences in a day.

But I feel as though I understand the Iranian youth face and I have to tell you...election fraud ain't gonna help one bit.

If the Supreme Leader wasn't so supremely idiotic, he'd get to the bottom of the election quick because if he stands in the way of progress, no matter how small, he's going to get steamrolled.

I'm not the expert, though, so check out this commentary from Fawaz A. Gerges, who is much more knowledgeable (and rockin' that mad unibrow) on the subject.

Commentary: Iran's hardliners are the real losers

courtesy of CNN.com

On Bigotry

Nobody raised their hands, so...here goes!

Disclaimer: If you are an unstable anti-Semite or white supremacist, let me preface this with two things.

1. You can think whatever you want. That's the power of the United States. I just think you'd be better served not prescribing to hate.
2. My thoughts probably are not worth your anger...so please don't make any threats of bodily harm. It's just not worth it to you. Trust me. Why would you threaten me knowing that it could lead to jail time...which probably leads to loss of freedom, self-respect (which is already running on fumes) and might lead to prison rape. So let's keep it civil and keep our hands to ourselves.

I don't really understand modern antisemitism.

Correction: I guess I don't understand any antisemitism, especially the modern incarnation. I should clarify that I don't think the tension between Palestinians and Israelis is antisemitism; I think both parties dislike each other independently of religion. Back to the topic at hand.

I was reading the web page of the scumbag who shot up the Holocaust Museum and the rhetoric he uses is ridiculous. He writes stuff like the "JEW CONSPIRACY to destroy the White gene-pool".

Who reads that and thinks "you know what...I think this guy's on to something"?

Or maybe it's the clever and subtle capitalization of "JEW CONSPIRACY" that does the trick.

Really, though, it shows you that this man has a certain audience in mind and may be part of that audience himself.

That audience, of course, is comprised by lazy-thinking, pig-ignorant misanthropes who have nothing better to do than blame all of their problems on Jews or Blacks or whatever minority has wronged the white man. It's not even that the anti-Semitic "school" of thought (in this context, I use the word school and thought very lightly) is lazy or ignorant or disgusting.

Sure, those things thoroughly damn anti-Semitism (and white supremacy), but there's something more subtle and subversive about it that bothers me.

It's just that it's such a...weak way of thinking.

Maybe I just have an extremely internal locus of control, but I believe that things, both bad and good, happen to me as a result of my own actions or thinking. I can't imagine what state my life would have to be in for me to want to blame other people for my problems, let alone Jews and Blacks. It reeks of one of the most underrated current problems in our country: a severe lack of perspective.

So to any budding white supremacists reading, take a step back for one second and examine your life. There is no conspiracy. Nobody is trying to ruin your life. You're only being fooled by the extremists writing this stuff. You're being manipulated into thinking that your problems are someone else's responsibility and, in turn, that you are powerless to fix your own life. If you continue thinking your powerless to change your life for the better, you're going to end up alone, dependent on others, in jail or dead...

You are wasting your time with these hateful, fear-mongering bigots. You could be doing

something much more productive, like your homework. Or hugging your goddamn parents. Or...or playing Call of Duty!

Trust me...as someone who had been briefly and superficially caught up in that spiral of fear and hate, I can tell you that this is not the way to a good life. You're stronger and smarter than this.

I was going to write a long entry about my feelings for white supremacy (it's saved and ready to post), but I just kind of got cold feet.

So...show of hands...how many of you readers are unstable white supremacists?

10 Years Ago

A friend told me this afternoon that today, ten years ago, we were at DAR Constitution Hall walking across the stage, picking up a piece of paper that represented the culmination of thirteen years of education.

We left the building with smiles plastered on our faces, hopeful of the future to come.  We'd just finished thirteen years of school: we could do anything.  We would do anything.  We were so sure of that.

But on reflection, ten years later, how is my life any different?

Sure...I graduated from college, traveled a little, had a few failed relationships and made a few really great friends, but honestly?  How has anything changed?

And what happened to that huge reserve of hope?  

Was it ever really there to begin with?

Everything Is Terrible

I'm in the midst of a pretty huge shame-cycle/hangover after my latest idiotic wedding bender.  I think it was mostly harmless...mostly...

But I'll write more about weddings tomorrow.

For now, notice the new link to your left, Everything is Terrible.

I stumbled upon it last night and fell instantly in love.  It's a website that hunts down and exposed the wonderful, ridiculous videos from our recent past.

Check out some of the horrible videos and enjoy.

Longish wedding update tomorrow.

I just don't have anything to write about today...so enjoy this video!!

I'm such a hack.

Did someone say they wanted a Mary Poppins remix courtesy of youtube musician Fagottron?

That just happened.

Seriously...something very substantial on Monday.  Seriously.

Celebrity or Sleestak?

This is the most fun game ever invented.


Back with something more substantial tomorrow.

Girls and Their Robots or How I Learned to Stop Worrying About My Life

I think I'm at a stage of my life where I merely exist on this imperceptible pivot between youth and middle-age.  I'm not really doing anything to pursue the dreams I had when I graduated college, nor am I doing anything to secure any of the hopes I had about my 30s and 40s.

I'm in this limbo where I'm too old to like the things kids like, but to young to settle for some of the things older people like.

That's why I'm always so ecstatic when a song or movie comes out that is fun and kitschy, but also mature enough for me to love.  

Royksopp (royk-sopp...exactly as it's spelled) is a Norwegian pop/dance/electronic band that has been moderately popular in the States for a while now and is, probably, much more popular in Europe.  On their most recent album they teamed up with fellow Scandinavian Robyn, who is, in my estimation, the greatest thing since sliced bread.  I love her voice and the way she blends a cheekiness with her obvious talent.  The song they made is called "The Girl and the Robot" and it's about...you guessed it...a girl and her robot.  Not in a dirty way, fellas, but in a pining, yearning way that hasn't been heard with such a mix of earnest and silliness since Madonna.  Early Madonna, like "Like a Virgin".

You don't need to be an unabashed fan of European electropop to like this song because it's one of those rare pop tunes that, like "Borderline", is too fun to dislike.  I feel really sorry for you if you don't like it at least a little because I'm going to make this song huge if it's the last thing I do.

Here it is.  It's safe for work, so crank it and spread it around your workplace like a cold.  Unless it's against company policy to rock out.  Then you better wait until you get home.

Text-booking

On my way to and from work every day I pass a Montgomery County police station.  For the most part, MoCo's finest have upheld the law with honor and pride, especially during the Beltway Sniper saga.  They really held it together.

I live near a fairly recognizable park that may or may not have been the filming location to a very famous late-90s horror flick about a witch and three kids...you know the one...and sometimes we hear weird sounds at night.  Sounds that are perfectly explainable in the daytime, but frightening in the night.  Sometimes we end up calling our local neighborhood peace officer to check things out because...you know...they have high-powered flashlights and guns, while all I have is soggy pants and a high-power brain that tells me to let braver people poke around outside at night.  

I feel comfortable and proud to say that the Montgomery County Police are patient, effective and make me feel safer.

Except when I drive by their offices and see a big electronic sign advertising their policy of accepting anonymous tips via text message.  This seems like a good plan: hell, it is a good plan.

But wasn't texting while driving made illegal in Maryland?

(Yes.)

But...don't these police signs advertise law breaking then since the only way people see these signs is when they are driving?

You tell me.

It sure seems a bit fishy.

Hot Links

Cheney says: "No Link Between Hussein and 9/11."  1.3 Million Dead People Ask: "WTF Dick?"

So...if there was no link...why did we go into Iraq?  I've held out for a long time and supported going into Iraq, knowing full well that there was no link between 9/11 and Hussein, knowing full well that bin Laden considered Hussein an apostate and would never have collaborated with him...and I stood there defending that sham war because I thought we'd made a big mess and we ought to clean it up.  Not for our good, but for the good of the Iraqi people.  We went in there on a whim, duped by a half-baked lie that Iraq posed a threat to our national security, and we laid waste to the infrastructure of a whole country, leaving it vulnerable to poverty and extremism.  I sure do hope in the next 30 years, me and mine don't reap what you played such an instrumental role in sewing, Dick.  

When An Opposing Team Sees Matt Wieters Come Up To The Plate, There Is Crying In Baseball.

Matt Wieters is the biggest prospect for the Baltimore Orioles in a long time.  There is a universal agreement that eventually he will be great.  This is a website of Chuck-Norris-Like Facts about Mr. Wieters.  My only hope in this world is that Matt Wieters lives up to half of the hype surrounding him.  I've never felt this way about a young ballplayer.  He's special already for galvanizing a fanbase and putting some seats in Camden Yards.  

Susan Boyle in a Yorkshire Pudding and Other Celebrities

Yup.  It's exactly what it says: Susan Boyle's face in Yorkshire Pudding.  I think Puddin' Face Boyle is a pretty great gangster name.  I digress...scroll down and check out the black-and-white photograph of the woman holding a tea cup.  What celebrity is in that picture?

Scroll down and look into the most horrifying table known to man.  The power of Christ compels yew!  The power of Christ compels yew!

Are you an A-to-K Level Celebrity with a Pazzaropzi Problem?  

CALL QUWEEN!!!

Katharine McPhee in Paparazzi Protection from Katharine McPhee

OH NOES!  Cattack!

I found this link a week or so ago and it's kind of my go-to for when I'm feeling down.  It really puts things in perspective for me.  I may have troubles, but that cat just keeps on attacking that store, like a little engine who could.  And it helps me to go on with my life and forget my problems.  Maybe the genius who killed the abortionist in Kansas should have looked at this a little more instead of killing a person to further his message that killing is wrong.  Maybe the cattack would have soothed his self-righteous hatred for this man who, by my own admittance, has a horrible job, but is just as deserving of his life as anybody else.  I hate it when pro-life activists kill people, whether through death penalty activism or abortion clinic bombings or straight-out murder, because it makes their perfectly rational argument that abortion is wrong look so ridiculous.  It's even more disgusting that some people are celebrating his death.  Aren't you all supposed to be pro-LIFE?

To leave on a high note, here's a comedy troupe called Honor Student doing their best to educate us on the finer points of sport.

Take it away Coach Wiener